Real Life Questions From a Real Life Intern

Can I eat these snacks lying around the office? How many pieces of candy are we allowed to take per trip to the admin's desk? Is it bad to walk around barefoot in the office? And if so, why? Can I call dibs on all the instant hot cocoa packets with marshmallows in the break room? Do adults even drink instant hot cocoa with marshmallows? Is the office PG or PG-13? Where do I go when I need to take a nap? Why don't I know the name of the lady I'm having lunch with? Do I say hi to the IT guy? Is he my friend? Is this dual-action printer also a Transformer? If not, why does it look like one? Why are all these office supplies free? How many office supplies can I take before I am cut off? Can I cover my cubicle with tapestries and curtains so it looks like I'm working in a gypsy tent? What is the office etiquette on farting? If you hear someone fart is it okay to laugh? Can anyone smell the banana I'm eating? Does having multiple computer monitors give off the impression that I'm working harder? What is the rule on replacing the office chair with a La-Z-Boy? Why are only certain people invited to lunch? Do high school cliques continue to exist after high school? What is the social paradigm of this particular office? Who do I talk to about implementing a 4 o'clock happy hour?