Yes, we all wish we could spend the greater portion of our work day in that cozy toilet stall (we all have a favorite), but we absolutely cannot. Besides, it gets lonely in there sometimes and even scrolling through all of hiyorin0207's photos of English bulldog puppies on Instagram won't cure that innate need for contact with the outside world. This brings us to part II of maximizing your work day.
Work the office like a baus.
Just because you work in a gray, barren cell of lost dreams doesn't mean you can't venture out and poke around other gray, barren cells of lost dreams. Through two seconds of wiki-research, I did not find what I was looking for but I did learn that an office of cubicles is aptly named a cube farm. I would like someone to develop Cube Farmville now, please. This cube farm is my playground and I like to walk around it like a baus (especially en route to the bathroom). Here's how you proceed:
1. Email is overrated.
Need to contact someone within your cube farm? Do NOT contact them via email. Instead, walk over to their cube and kindly disrupt their work to relay your message. Linger a bit and comment on what they're wearing or just smile at them. These are all good things.
2. Participate in petty office talk.
Keep at least one ear alert at all times. This means leaving one earbud out while you listen to this (thank you Phil for reintroducing this to my life). The moment you hear others gather to talk about things that don't really matter, zoom over on your rollie chair and participate.
For example:
Instigator: Does anyone have a sweater?
Others: No, sorry.
(you zoom over to location)
You: Neither do I. Why?
Instigator: I have a client from the Philippines and she thought our summers were like theirs. She's really cold!
Others: Oh no that's terrible.
Instigator: Yea, and the A/C in here isn't helping, etcebullshitera.
You: I wonder how hot it is in the Philippines right now.
Others: It must be so warm, etcebullshitera
Conversation continues for another 5 minutes.
If you're lucky, these petty office conversations usually occur about twice during the work day, excluding lunch time. However, sometimes people are really busy for some reason and the day may drone on without a single piece of useless information passing through. This is when you have to be the Instigator.
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